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It's Time to Detox


I have a confession. I have worn my pants with the top notch undone the last two days. Why, you ask? Because the pants could not contain the additional carbs I have ingested over the holidays. It's my pants' fault, really. They just aren't doing their job.

But if I was honest with myself, I just haven't felt "right". My back hurts, my hips hurt, my feet hurt. And now my stomach hurts. That one is new. I am completely and totally aware that it is not my pants, but me. Or rather, the bits and parts of me that I have added on the last couple months.

Before Christmas break, I was headed to a presentation with a co-worker. She was talking about all of the cookies she had been making and just being around these foods prompted in her this need to eat healthy. All she wanted that morning was a protein shake. She said how funny it was that our bodies seem to speak to us, to tell us what we need...I added silently, "even when it's not what we want".

If you have ever been at a loud party or concert, it is not until you are in your car, sitting in silence, that you realize just how terribly loud it was, how overstimulated your senses may have been. And then your mind sort of exhales into the peace of stillness and quiet. At least I do. I am an extrovert with introvert tendencies. I enjoy the silence and particularly crave it when surrounded by chaos.

Today, I took a moment to breathe into the silence and listened to what my body was telling me. It needs to be cleansed. I feel like my body just underwent the equivalent of the chaos that is Woodstock. Now it's time to draw myself out of the chaos and detox.

I'm not an extreme person, but I am pretty dedicated for the most part. As I recollected my healthiest time of life, it was (unsurprisingly) before I got pregnant and right after I got married. The picture I've shared is from that time in my life. I began running (or jogging slowly, rather) in 5K's through a corporate wellness program at my workplace.  Since college, I enjoyed yoga, so I also took a yoga class at work. You want to talk about dedication? I had it.

The day before my birthday and two days before an upcoming 5K, my knee went out. The doctor said that due to the wearing down of tissue under my kneecap, I shouldn't ever run. EVER. Like never-ever.

This broke my heart. I still did yoga, but it wasn't the same. About four months later I got pregnant. A month and a half later, I miscarried. The pounds came on with a vengeance. Then I got pregnant again with my beautiful princess Arya. I lost over 30 pounds with Weight Watchers, but recently (as indicated above) gained some of it back.

Throughout the heartbreak and physical pain I experienced in the year before I had Arya, I learned something about myself. I was very attune to my body. Not many people have that gift. And I know when my body is angry with me. Right now, it is downright furious.

It's time to listen. It's time to draw myself out of the chaos and detox.

Comments

  1. AnonymousJanuary 10, 2017 at 8:18 PM

    Love this and needed the reminder that I need to find some quiet so I can tune in to what I need... thanks for sharing!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Today & All the TomorrowsJanuary 11, 2017 at 2:13 PM

    Thanks for reading! :)

    ReplyDelete

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